my sasusaku fanfic
by Jaketheripper
Summary: lolzrz please rate and review
1. Chapter 1

my sasusaku fanfic

a oneshot by jaketheripper

i know, i'd much rather have the real naruhina or sasusaku." well for my fellow naruhina/sasusaku fans out there, i salute you and believe me, i would much rather see the real naruhina or sasusaku, but since there isn't one right now i will be giving you some gum to chew before dinner, any of you who doubt my intentions can bite it, for you sasusaku fans out there i will show you the power of annoyance to induce love!

anyway, this story is about a character that joins sasuke's team taka, it's my character, his name is jeiku chinsori, a previous member of the akatsuki, he knew sasuke back at the ninja academy, he finds a friend in sasuke and a very good leader as well, he is taller than any of the members of team taka as well, as of this moment Suigetsu, Karin, Sasuke, Jugo and Jeiku are dashing up a mountain towards their hideout, a pagoda resting on the other side of this particular mountain, for some stupid reason jeiku is stroking a rabbit he has in his hands, sasuke looks at the rabbit with loathing, "why did you bring, that, thing to our pagoda?" jeiku notices that they are all looking at him, he chuckles and answers, holding up a single finger as he does, "this is just a little friend i had to fight for my lunch the other day, this little booger can fight."

sasuke shakes his head and makes a grab for the rabbit, "we can't have pets, they'll slow us down." jeiku shook his head, "i wouldn't do that if i was you." as he said this, sasuke laid a hand on the rabbit, it jumped out of jeiku's hand and kicked sasuke in the chest, the resulting shockwave from this kick nearly sent sasuke over the edge of the mountain, if jugo hadn't caught him he would have fallen.

once sasuke had brushed himself off he addressed the problem, "WHAT THE HELL IS THAT THING?" the rabbit jumped back into jeiku's arms.

jeiku really looks puzzled this time, "i truly have no idea, it could be anything from a normal rabbit with incredible powers to a ninja that was cursed with the short life of an animal." the rabbit looked smug in his arms, it stuck it's tongue out at sasuke, instead of sasuke getting curious though it was karin who then got curious, "if you allow me to study it, i might be able to determine which it is."

jeiku smiled, "i would love that karin, but frankly i think my little friend would just as well be left alone."

karin shrugged and they entered the pagoda, sasuke immediately adjourned to his quarters, but jeiku followed him silently and closed the door behind him, the slam made sasuke jump, "jeiku, what the hell are you doing in my quarters?"

jeiku put the rabbit down and walked over to sasuke, "you are a moron sasuke uchiha, i see you pass up three flavors of ass, and you don't even feel sorry about it."

staring up at his friend, sasuke's eyes go from surprised, to pissed off, "what the hell? you're going to start this now?"

jeiku sat down, which brought him down to sasuke's level, "yes, i am going to start this now, first i see you pass up ino, i could understand that, but then Sakura, i understand you threw her a bone when you left but now your spurning karin, WHAT THE HELL?"

sasuke turned around, "i have no time for "ass" jeiku, i'm serious when i say i have nothing else but the mission."

jeiku grabbed sasuke by the collar of the shirt and lifted him off his feet, sasuke's eyes widened as jeiku continued, "you set out to avenge your family's death, then you found out that your brother was the good guy, now your doing just what orochimaru did, and your previous girlfriend hates you, although you may be able to save this if you make like your village and leaf!"

jeiku smiled moronically and when no one laughed, he resumed his angry rant, "if you leave right now, you can save your relationship, i will tell the group that you have left on a secret mission and you will go to the leaf village to inform the hokage about my plan to destroy the village."

sasuke shook his head, "your insane!"

jeiku yelled, "AND YOU HAVE SOMEONE WHO CARES ABOUT YOU! MORE THAN ANYONE ELSE EVER WILL! AND SHE LIVES IN THE LEAF VILLAGE! HER NAME IS SAKURA HARUNO AND YOU MUST GO!"

jeiku slapped sasuke in the face and put him down, "think about it for a second."

sasuke was suddenly hit with a revaluation, "man, i've been a real ass."

jeiku nodded, "and an emo ass at that."

sasuke sat up, "you are right my friend, but of course, you are WRONG! to tell me in such a disrespectful manor!"

sasuke burnt him with a fireball and ran to the window, "do as you said you would and i will do as you asked."

jeiku put up a thumbs up and walked out.

"what the hell happened to you?" asked karin when she saw his burnt visage, "lord uchiha has gone on a secret mission, we are to proceed as planned, i will use my chakara cannon to destroy the leaf while he subverts it from the inside."

karin thought for awhile and then nodded, "alright jeiku-san. we will do as you ask,"

to be continued?


	2. Chapter 2

my sasusaku fanfic

back by popular demand, chapter 2 is here, enjoy as laughs and violence ensue, and sasuke gets his ass kicked!

chapter 2

team taka was running through the trees, fighting off leaf ninja as they went, sasuke had made it inside the leaf village, jeiku subliminally wished for him to come up with a good reason for bieng evil for the past coulpe years.

**inside the hokage's office**

lady tsunade is pacing in front of sasuke who is tied to a chair with a determined look on her face "now lets get this straight, for the last few years, you have been under the control of orochimaru, who is now dead, then after that, another ninja by the name of jeiku brainwashed you and you only now broke free."

sasuke nodded, somewhere in the distantce, jeiku did a facepalm that he knew not why.

and the ntsunade sat down, "and now your telling me that your previous master is at our front gate?"

the ground shook and sasuke smiled at her "thats what i'm telling you."

tsunade walked towards the door, "sakura, watch him."

with that, the pissed off visage of sakura haruno entered the room, "hello sasuke."

**on the main wall of the leaf village**

team taka is standing guard while jeiku is charging his chakara cannon, rock lee jumps up the walls and tried to kick jeiku but he is repelled by karin, who sends him falling back to earth, he hit his head on the ground and was unconcious, "thank you karin, this takes quite some concentration."

karin nodded to him and he resumed charging, he had already fired it once, the huge beam of chakara had seared a big hole in the school building, he never really had liked the school, he was reaching his peak when he saw sasuke talking to sakura inside the hokage's house, it wasn't pretty.

**inside the hokage's house**

sakura was beating the snot out of sasuke, as she was doing so, he appologised over and over again, "you-" punch "IDIOT!" punch, "i'm" punch "SORRY!" punch, "BASTARD!" punch, "PIG!"

after she was done, sasuke's bruised visage gave way to one of somber silence, after awhile she realised what she had done, jeiku willed her to forgive him and belive his story, which she eventually did, she bent down and kissed him on the lips, tears in her eyes, he looked up at her and returned the kiss, deeper and deeper the kiss went, until they were straight up making out.

**back outside**

jeiku was satisfied and motioned to the rest of the team, "come here and check this out."

they all crept a bit closer to jeiku, karin sensed something off about this, but she drew closer anyway, not as close as the others though, jeiku snapped arround and triggered his chakara cannon, where team taka had been, there was now a pile of ashes and a hole driven through the trees , straight on to the dessert, the beam carved a path through the forrest, the only one left was karin, and she had only gotten her leg stuck in the beam, she was now on the ground screaming as she clutched her stump of a leg.

jeiku approached her, he bent down and kissed her on the lips, putting some tongue in, he got back up and unsheathed a sword, "i am truly sorry karin, i would have done this any other way, i must say, you are a lovley woman, i would have loved to save your life for later when we would have had a chance to date, but it seems that fate has dealt me a bad hand."

he raised his sword and a fireball burnt his hand and melted his sword, he turned and changed character the minute he saw sasuke, sakura and naruto, he spoke in a deeper voice, "well well mr. uchiha, we meet again."

sajura's hands started to glow and jeiku was surrounded, "do you expect me to beg sakura?" asked jeiku as he drew another katana, sakura laughed, "no mr. chinsori, i expect you do DIE!"

jeiku jumped up just as sakura aimed for his feet, the ground shattered and jeiku ran for his life, a fireball exploded over his head, he used another special jiutsu to summon poison spikes that then coated his body like armor, but something his new armor couldn't protect him from was a...wait for it...CLIFF!

he was holding with one clawed hand when naruto caught up, once the other two caught up, he yelled in the deep voice, "i'm glad you found your bitch sasuke."

sakura made like she was going to attack him but sasuke held her back, "surrender." he said, jeiku laughed, "surrender? to me? i accept."

naruto laughed and jeiku smiled, "at least someone likes my jokes."

with that, sakura stomped on the cliff, sending half of it into the deep ravine, she hugged sasuke, "no one will ever mess with my sasuke's head again."

**two and a half days later**

jeiku woke up in a tent, his ribs hurt and he felt like he had a concussion, but he was alive, he looked next to him and saw the unconcious karin with one leg, he looked arround for his savior but only saw his rabbit friend in the doorflap, it hopped up to him and leaped into his arms, he stroked the rabbit as it purred in it's rabbit sounds, "hey little guy, do you know who saved us?"

the rabbit suddenly giggled in a familiar female voice, "that would be me bro."

he jumped as the rabbit transformed into a red headed female ninja wearing a green mizugumo, "AYANO? YOU WERE THE RABBIT?"

ayano laughed again, "yea bro, it was me, but that doesn't mean you have to stop scratching my head, that felt sooo good."

jeiku sighed and resumed his scratching of her scalp, she shuddered in happiness, "oooh yeeeeaaah." she groaned, he stopped and she whined, she turned arround and looked at him with big eyes, "ayano, what are you doing here? why did you save me?"

she put her hands on her hips and stood up, "look mister, just because we parted ways at childhood doesn't mean i have to stay away, you're my big brother, i like to keep a watch on my big brother."

jeiku sighed, "then why did you save her?" he asked, pointing to karin

she smirked, "are you telling me you don't like her? i saw you two making out."

jeiku blushed, "that was private, plus she was dying."

ayano giggled, "you ARE insane bro, if you think that making out with her would ease her pain, you were dead wrong, when i found her, she was crying and saying something about sasuke."

jeiku thought for awhile, but then he saw ayano's hands glow green and she put it up to karin's leg stump, her leg regrew, but it was going slowly, she put another glowing hand on jeiku's chest, he choked as he felt a fire inside his chest, he fell back onto the cott he was on, and was unconcious.


	3. Chapter 3

my sasusaku fanfic

again, by popular demand, my fanfic is back!

chapter 3

**the next day**

jeiku woke up to a scream, all of a sudden two small hands wrapped arround his throat and squeezed hard, "YOU PERVERTED BASTARD, I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!"

jeiku threw whoever it was off him, that person got up and tried it again, the second time, he opened his eyes, karin was up and alive, but she was trying to strangle him, he held her at bay with one foot while he called out the door flap, "SIS! SIS! WE-fuckit, I, NEED HELP!"

ayano came running, she saw this and laughed, "what happened jeiku? did you loose your mojo?"

jeiku scowled at her as karin jumped and noticed her, "who's she? where am i? and WHY THE HELL DID YOU MAKE OUT WITH ME?"

jeiku rolled over to face her, noticing as he did that he could see up the dress that his sister had given her, his eyebrows did an involuntary jig and karin noticed what she was wearing, she punched jeiku's head into the ground and ran back into the tent.

ayano walked up to jeiku, she chuckled as jeiku held up a finger, "not. a. word."

ayano opened her mouth to retort, but he put a hand over her mouth, "shush bunny."

he pulled his head out of the ground and walked into the tent after karin, he was immediatley hit over the head with a frying pan, he fell to the ground, karin got on top of him and pulled his head up by his hair, she whispered questions in his ear, "okay, question 1, why did you kiss me when my fucking LEG was burnt off by your attempt to murder us?"

jeiku sighed, "isn't it obvious? i'm in love with y-"

karin slammed his face into the ground and held it there while she screamed, "no, no, no, i didn't hear that, my love forever and ever is sasuke and only sasuke, please tell me you didn't say that!"

she lifted his head up and he smiled, " i'm in love with y-"

she slammed his head into the floor three more times, he smiled a bloody smile, "beating on me doen't change my mind, i'm still in love with y-"

she slammed his head into the ground one more time and ayano struck a pressure point on her back, she fell unconcious, ayano then turned into a rabbit and hopped up to jeiku, she nuzzled her way under his hand and he started to pet her, he pulled his face from the dirt, he took a towel and wiped his face off, "ow." he said in a depressed voice, "you think she'll ever let me say that i l-" he stopped saying the word love when karin's body twitched, "my god, she seems to have that reflex wired into her system."

ayano in her rabbit form stuck her tongue out at the unconcious karin and nuzzled her way into a fold of his mizugumo, he chuckled as she crawled her way up his chest and onto his shoulder, she stuck her head out of his shirt and suzzled his face, "man, you're so cute when you're a rabbit."

she transformed back into his sister, still on his shoulder and crushed him underneath her new larger weight.

"cute you say?" she giggled, jeiku rolled out from under her and sat down, "what do we do now? i'm a villain to the leaf village, word is sure to spread."

ayano laughed, "well, sasuke was a villain to the leaf village, but one makeout later, he was a goodguy again."

jeiku smiled, "i guess that's so."

ayano nodded and had a sudden inspiration, "how about i dress up as a random akatsuki member and you defeat me in front of the entire leaf village?"

jeiku laughed, "but that would require an akatsuki robe-"

ayano pulled one out of her mizugumo, "of course, but it would also take-"

all of a sudden, ayano changed into a man with a shark face with black hair.

"of course, you have everything ready already?"

she nodded and they left unconcious karin there in the tent.

**an hour of rehearsing later**

the village shook again, "not again" said sasuke as he ran outside, but to his disbeleif, he saw jeiku fighting, not one of the village's ninja, but an akatsuki member, every time the akatsuki member would go for one of the citizens, he would get in the way, the two were trading blows when jeiku did the most unrealistic uppercut, the akatsuki member obviously jumped and flew into a tree, jeiku held up his hands and shouted, "AND DON'T COME BACK!"

sasuke didn't buy it one bit, but the people flooded arround him, cheering.

naruto and sakura come arround and saw this, naruto looked confused, "wait, he's a hero now?"

sasuke shrugged, "i guess things do change."

**later that afternoon**

lady tsunade obviously didn't recognise him, so she bestowed a medal of honor onto him for saving the village, jeiku then took the team on a walk through the woods, sakura was having doubts, "so, you were the goodguy all along, and sasuke here, saw the error of his ways to get me back?"

jeiku smiled, "yea, that's pretty much it."

sakura punched sasuke in the shoulder and hugged him, "i feel so loved."

jeiku lead them to the tent and saw nobody but karin inside the tent and ayano in her rabbit form, sasuke stopped and stared at the rabbit, he saw it before jeiku did, "no."

jeiku stopped and saw the rabbit in their path, "what? oh the rabbit."

sasuke got behind sakura, "is it the same fucking rabbit?"

jeiku nodded and sasuke shrunk even more behind sakura, who looked at jeiku with a scowl on her face, "what does a rabbit have to do with anything?"

jeiku scratched his head, "back at the pagoda, he met the rabbit and it kicked his ass."

sakura laughed and her hands started to glow, "rabbit stew coming up baby, just gimme 30 seconds."

sakura lunged at the rabbit, only to have it dodge and kick her in the face, she felw into the tent, which collapsed, sasuke hid behind jeiku now, "that fucking rabbit!"

jeiku laughed as naruto charged at it, he threw a kunai at it and it missed, the rabbit then warped on top of his head, naruto didn't notice, he looked arround for his quarry, but the rabbit was having the time of it's life, ayano smiled as she draped herself over naruto's face and licked his nose, naruto was very careful in his planning of a punch aimed at the rabbit, but just as he threw it, the rabbit jumped off his face and he punched himself out.

ayano lept off his unconcious body and mimiked roaring at the sky before turning into a human again, "hey bro, you brought friends."

this made sasuke step back, "the-the rabbit is your sister?"

jeiku looked at the look on sasuke's face and laughed hard, "OH MY..HAHAHAHAHAHAHH..GOD...HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA"

sasuke not only looked startled, but he was chuckling, "i got my ass kicked by your sister."

jeiku nodded.

**two hours later**

the others had woken up, exept for sakura and karin.

they were discussing things, when both karin and sakura woke up, they looked at eachother and yelled, "YOU!"

jeiku put his face in his hand, "here we go again."

sasuke got up and tried to stop the conflict, while naruto, ayano and jeiku sat eating ramen, jeiku leaned over towards naruto, "so, i hear you have girl problems."

ayano loled her head back with a look of exasperation on her face, "oh god."

**fin...for now...until next time when i make a naruhina fanfic!**

**hope you enjoyed, toon in next time to hear jeiku say, "**what is this stuff in the shepherd's pie, it tastes disgusting.**"**

**aslo tune in next time to hear ayano say, "**that's not shepherd's pie, it's my litter box."

**but as i said, for now...**

**fin!**


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